Growing up dark

words by Arehone B Raselabe

I am a dark skin black girl and I would be lying if I said colorism has not affected me negatively more than anything, affected me while growing up. Unfortunately, most of the things we have to heal from are those from our childhood.

Growing up dark was not easy and I am sure the same is true for most dark skin black girls and most of it was inflicted by our peers (I would like to highlight just how cruel kids can be because wow! They can be so cruel) and the society we grew up in.

I can not really pinpoint the exact moment I was aware of my skin tone but thinking back there were always subtle hints here and there, that as a kid I couldn't quite put my finger on it but what I do know for sure is that I was treated differently and it's only later on that it became obvious as to why.

Growing up dark meant being subjected to constant name-calling, I would like to once again highlight just how cruel kids can be. Not only that, you also were not really affirmed as a kid let alone being called beautiful. How many of you as a kid were once told that they would be prettier if maybe, just maybe you were a little lighter? Just me?...okay. The sad part is that all this was said by those older than us people we look up to. I am pretty sure that every dark skin girl went through a phase where they wished they were lighter because maybe then life could be a little bit easier for them.

Dark skin women have never been seen as desirable, delicate, soft, feminine, or worthy of attention. All this is depicted very well in media and on television. I want you to look back at all-black movies from before 2010 and one thing you will notice is that dark skin women were never cast as the lead or love interest if there is a dark skin woman in the movie she is usually the undesirable friend, also look at music videos the same thing. The only time a dark skin woman is put as the lead in most music videos is if she has a big botty, big breasts features that are hyper-sexualized in the black community.

It is things like these that further perpetuate colorism in our society, that anything that is closer to whiteness is better and more desirable. This is not to say light skin woman don't have any struggles, we all do however it would be unfair for women with lighter skin tones to deny that there are privileges that come with having the shade of their skin

I would like to highlight importantly that this is not a dark skin VS light skin agenda but a conversation that we should all be having because even in this day and age colorism is a monster that still lurks in the black community and maybe having these conversations will also make us aware of our own unconscious biases with regards to how we treat our very own.

Colorism is the legacy of colonialism and one thing our colonizers will not do is come and correct this. We have to come together and fight and defeat this monster that further divides us. As black people, we already go through so much so now more than ever we need to come together and not let things like how light or dark the shade of your skin is continue to cause a rife between us.

The skin is the largest organ of the body and yes it does play a huge role in determining your race, at best it serves as a protective shield against all elements, it is the body's first line of defence it shouldn't be what determines how anyone should or shouldn't be treated.

So today I'm asking you that the next time you see a black girl or boy regardless of the hue or the shade of their skin tell them they are beautiful, compliment them, assert them, affirm them. In a world that is already so against our very existence leave them with the confidence to conquer it, not one more thing to heal from. I love us for real and I want us to all win

Love and light Arehone